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Darren Giles has lost his college scholarship, can't work up the courage to ask out the girl of his dreams and doesn't have the cash to stay in college another semester. Unless he can survive the teenage dominatrix, New York's largest drug mogul, convince his parents he's not gay, write a paper on Dante's Inferno, escape three thugs chasing the wrong guy and sell fifty pills of ecstasy in time to make his tuition payment, he'll never get the chance to date the girl of his dreams.